If you really knew me...

I wrote this piece in September 2019 originally for the opening of the school year at Back-to-School Night at SFS. I was inspired by an introduction game played at The Mosaic Project, “If you really knew me…” I wanted to shine a light on how so often middle school is a time to mask who we really are.

... I want to take us back to middle school….

If you really knew me... you would know that when I was in middle school, I was lost. Out of my class of 32 kids, I only felt comfortable going to Jennifer’s house...her mom was so cool—she wore jeans...my mom never wore jeans.  

If you really knew me, in 6th Grade you’d know that I ran like the wind.  I was on our relay team with Jason, Tyrone, and Aaron. We flew around the track during the annual city meet and to the shock of the all-boys teams, we left them in the dust and took home the medal.

If you really knew me, you’d know that no one in my class ever came over to my house - even though some of us had been in school together from kindergarten to 8th grade.  

If you really knew me, you’d know that I can remember the moment when in 5th Grade I wished I was white...because I believed if my skin was lighter, if my eyes were blue, my hair blond, then I’d be beautiful.

If you really knew me, you’d know that I was lost among my 7th grade classmates who wore plate-size Duran-Duran buttons debating who was cuter, Simon or John, while I couldn’t tell the difference between the two.

If you really knew me, you’d know I have loved to read since before I started school, and I could find safety through words and imaginary worlds.

If you really knew me, you’d know in 8th grade I stood in front of a mirror trying to put on purple, glitter eye-liner after realizing all the girls wore makeup but me.

If you really knew me today, you’d know that I believe I am called to this work...and while this work is hard and that even with hard work I know I make mistakes. I have to move forward with humility and readiness to make positive change...and even with all that….

If you really knew me, you would know that I feel so blessed to be a part of this whole team at The San Francisco School - this community you have chosen to be a part of because we are all dedicated to supporting the growth of every student.

And so, I want to share a moment with you from the summer...which feels really far away right now...I had the opportunity to stand at the shore of the Mediterranean and look out into the open, never-ending sea.  Some of you know I taught ancient history prior to my time here. And as I stood on the shore, I was struck by what it must have been like for the families to come to the beach and watch their loved ones sail into the unknown, not knowing what lay ahead for them - when they would be back. And it made me think of this work we do--the work with young people at this critical time in their lives.

We are your partners.

We will be standing on the shore with you as your children do as they must - sail out into the waters of adolescence - longing for the adventure and yearning for the comfort of home all at the same time.

And as they navigate both the turbulent, tossing waves fighting off gale-force winds—together we can be that safe shore, that lighthouse for them to see in the darkness and turn towards for safety... Then there will be other days when they will sail across the mirror-smooth open ocean with the wind at their back, and they will go so far that we can only see the small tip of the mast on the horizon... We’ll be there with you too, on the shore knowing that they need a place to return to.  

For that is adolescence—the sailing away, the testing of the waters, and the returning to you, to us, on shore.  

This team, you and the teachers you will meet tonight, is the community grounding your children in how to face what is ahead. 

Sometimes we’re on the boat with them - coaching them on how to unfurl their sails - and sometimes we’re out ahead, beckoning them to steer their own vessel and urging them on... Other times, we are standing alongside you, waving from the shore as they sail away, looking forward to their return so that we can learn all that they have seen and done.

This year we are continuing to reflect on and deepen our academic program—from developing Seminars in 7th and 8th grade math, crafting our new Writer’s Workshop program in 6th and 7th Grade humanities, and to continuing to expand our global community through Spanish.

This year we are continuing to reach and fulfill our Strategic Plan in meaningful ways—from The Workshop and having open sessions throughout the day for students to explore and create; expanding our definition of art and all the ways we can meaningfully express ourselves; and to evaluating how we use time for deeper, more experiential learning experiences.

This year we also are taking a deeper dive into our program on social emotional learning.  Community and relationships have long been a key part of the “secret sauce” of SFS. And this year we are paying particular attention to how we partner with families in this challenging time to raise young people.  We are capitalizing on a key asset that SFS has, the dedicated educators who believe in the power of community to enable students to thrive.